The last blog of 2009

Wow. Here we are at the end of the first decade of the 21st century.
Can you remember what was happening at the end of the last decade? The thing that remains in my mind is that we were being told that “We’re all doomed” – to borrow a saying from Fraser in Dad’s Army. All the computers in the world were going to stop at one second past midnight because computers couldn’t cope with the two digit date structure going from 99 to 00, as 00 is earlier than 99 not later, and the world would be plunged back into the dark ages. Unless, that is, you employed lots of freelance IT “experts”, whose rates had suddenly increased. Ahem.Still, poor loves, I bet they had some super holidays and even new homes in 2000.
Anyway, surprise, surprise the world was not plunged into the abyss, which was just as well as I had a thumping hangover the on the 1st January 2000, in common with lots of other people. I don't think I could have faced global meltdown as well.

Christmas

I did think of doing a Christmas entry and calling it a Yule Blog. I’m glad I didn’t now as I can hear your groans from here!
La D and I had a lovely time. I have probably mentioned it before but we have set up some video call links with some of the family and did a lot of video calling. It really is very good. As long you have a web camera and download the same software, which is free, you can talk to and see each other for as long as you like. The call is also free which of course is a great benefit.
However there is a downside. The microphones are very sensitive and if for example I wanted to say to La D that uncle Rodney was wearing a hideous shirt/jumper I couldn’t just blurt it out without causing some embarrassment, particularly to La D as Rodney is her uncle and I don’t like him anyway. Still you soon learn the little dos and don’ts of video calling. Uncle Rodney’s still not speaking to either of us. But his shirt was appalling.

We had a good call with the DiL and MiL and assorted brothers and sisters several times over the period. In fact we had one yesterday.
Now in La D’s family, as it is rather large, they operate a sort of Family Secret Santa. You know where from a group, one person buys a present for someone else on behalf of the whole group. It works well. I was down to buy the DiL Christmas present. He’s a bit of a gadget man, a bit like myself. He was very interested in a little weather station that La D bought me for my last birthday so I thought I would get one for him as I knew he would love to get it set up straight away and start to measure temperatures around the house. Right up his street.
I wouldn’t say I was appalled, merely saddened, when he said yesterday that he hadn’t got round to getting two batteries required for setting up the outside sensor as he had been, and these are his exact words, “That busy”.
A fellow gadget man, unable to install a fully functioning gadget because he had been too busy to nip into town and get two small batteries. What is the world coming to?
As we ended the call, a small tear welled up in my right eye, no left, or was it my right? Well it doesn’t matter. Oh dear.

Bertie’s sister Jess was really good. We got out for some good walks and tried to tire them out, not with any great success, but they certainly enjoyed them.

The weather was quite weird. About 5 or 6 days before Christmas it was absolutely bitter. The temperatures never rose above 0° at all. On Christmas day at lunchtime we had a temperature of 21° outside with a slight balmy breeze. Very strange and not very Christmassy at all.

La Marchesa, one of La D’s sisters, sent us a box of goodies and in it was a present for Bertie. He loves it.

Yes, Mrs Malaprop is here again.

We were doing a crossword the other night and one of the clues was, “someone who receives stolen goods”.
La D piped up almost immediately and very brightly, 110% certain, “A hedge”.
I really couldn’t contain myself and just roared with laughter. If it hadn’t been the season of goodwill to all people, I fear I wouldn’t be sitting here typing up the blog.
“No darling” I said, still chortling. “It’s a fence”.
“Don’t darling me, you patronising little man. Hedge, fence what’s the difference? Bit like Smith and Smythe isn’t it?”
There really was only one option open to me; that was to agree

New Year – a few funnies

New Year's Day Quotes

New Year's Day: Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
Mark Twain
One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: To rise above the little things.
John Burroughs
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
Oscar Wilde

A New Year's Wish

On New Year's Eve, Marilyn stood up in the local pub and said that it was time to get ready. At the stroke of midnight, she wanted every husband to be standing next to the one person who made his life worth living.

Well, it was kind of embarrassing. As the clock struck - the barman was almost crushed to death.

One last one for those of you who are religious in nature, a New Year's Day Prayer:

Dear Lord.
So far this year I've done well.
I haven't gossiped, I haven't lost my temper, I haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, selfish, or overindulgent. I'm very thankful for that. But in a few minutes, Lord, I'm going to get out of bed, and from then on I'm probably going to need a lot more help.
Amen

All the very best to everyone for 2010. Felice anno nuovo.
May you be healthier, wealthier and wiser. Just remember if you are thinking of embarking on yet another failed diet, that “stressed” is dessert spelt backwards!

Ciao, mantenere la fede. Vi vedo anno prossima